“I Praise My Destroyer,” thoughts on poignancy and pain.

We got the annual family newsletter today. The red envelope says “Family is the Best!” It’s my grandma’s project. She’s an amazing woman, a true matriarch. Kind and hard, bullish but gentle. Adventurous and terribly clever.

She went month by month, documenting the highlights and lowlights of the year. I love that my grandma doesn’t sugarcoat things. November says, “My younger brother also passed away this year. I miss him.” The simple, arrow-through-the-heart poignancy of it.

Everyone is trying to put their best foot forward, it’s what social media is made of. We’re reminded every so often not to feel bad for not measuring up to others’ lives, because “it’s a highlight reel.” I praise the realness highlighted here.

“If I hadn’t started writing this letter two months ago, I wouldn’t have finished this year.

I am slipping this letter with love into a blank Christmas card or envelope, no comments but wishing you and your family a Merry Christmas, Happy Hannukah, and a very Healthy New Year.”


Because what is a year made of, but little moments of good and bad, changing tides of fortune. And what is a life made of, if not many such years?

We celebrate the good and the bad here, in this family.


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